Act 14: FAIL

Today we get to see the down side of vowing to capture this experience openly and publicly.  Sometimes, you have to look like an ass.

When I conceived of this idea, I had visions of myself triumphantly completing each item on the list with efficiency, grace and style.  I knew I would fail at one or two, but was expecting that.  Had played those out in my head.  I had already even thought about how I would capture them with the most clever self deprecating humor and wit.

So when  I found myself sitting in the parking lot of the location of today's Meetup, unable to make myself go in, it hit on me.  This is not flattering at all.  There is no graceful way to capture this.  This is not courageous.  There's no way I can possibly write about this.  I will look like an ass.

All the more reason to write about it, I suppose.

Granted, I had good reason for today's hiccup.  It was not just because of cold feet.  There were extenuating circumstances!  The challenge was to attend a meet-up where I don't know anyone and today's meeting would have been ineligible for that.  And while I did due diligence to avoid an uncomfortable situation, it didn't work.  So this doesn't count.

That's one of the things I'm telling myself.

I'm also going with: It's better to give the space necessary and Your presence could have made an uncomfortable situation.

The truth is that there is nothing I wanted more than to go in.  But I made a promise, and I intend to keep it.

I don't care if it does make me look like an ass.