I’m Happier Not Knowing

I have a 10 year journal that I use to record the highlights of each day.  It creates kind of a "This Day in History" for my life.  I was retroactively filling in Q2 of this year, it was a bit of a revelation.  It sucked!  The only two notable events I had listed was a concert I attended and an out-of-the-blue breakup. Everything else was a blank slate because, frankly during that time, I was in survival mode. Looking back was painful, at best.  And what did remembering give me?  Data?  I don’t need that kind of data; I know what’s what.  I wasn’t too keen on reliving those days, so maybe it’s better not coming back up. I decided I was happier not reliving it.

Image credit: Blindfolded Girl by barnimages.com

For a reflective person like me, that’s a hard adjustment to make.  I tend to ruminate on
EVERYTHING.  But, I’m coming to realize that it’s not always a good idea.  Maybe some things are better left alone.  As I thought about that, I realized I had naturally been playing a similar thought in my head on and off for weeks now:

I’m happier not knowing.

At first I was concerned.  Is that OK?  I’ve never been one to bury my head in the sand or shy away from hearing the hard truths.  And to be honest, I’ve always been a bit of a busybody.  But for some things, is willful ignorance a legitimate defense mechanism?  If you know the answer is going to do nothing but hurt you, is it better to just not ask the question?  I say yes.

If it is not information that I need to function; if it’s not something I have to act on; if it’s not essential to my life, then I say ignorance is bliss.  Some truths are undeniable, and will smack you in the face with their realness.  Those can’t be avoided.  But why go seeking out facts that are really none of your business and you know they are going to hurt?


 I’m happier not knowing.

Those four little words have become my mantra lately.  When I find myself wondering how the person who broke my heart is faring in his new relationship, I repeat them in my head:  I’m happier not knowing. 

What people really think of me?     I’m happier not knowing.

The gossipy highlights of the latest hookups?      I’m happier not knowing.

What the friendly ex-boyfriend is up to these days?      I’m happier not knowing.

The sordid details of an acquaintance’s failed relationship?      I’m happier not knowing.


It’s a versatile little phrase, and it’s saved me hours of heartache